SCBWI Squam Lake Writer's Retreat - Day 1 - Voice Lessons

It's Friday, September 6, 2013. I'm here on the site of Rockywold-Deephaven Camps in Holderness NH for the SCBWI Writer's Retreat at Squam Lake, where On Golden Pond was filmed. I am deep deep in the woods. It's beautiful up here. It's dark out here at night. Really dark. No city lights, no street lights, no tv lights mucking up the sky. I forgot my flashlight. That nifty flashlight app on my phone helped some, but it's so dark here that the darkness has shadows.

Back in my room, writing this post, some animal is scritch-scratching on the roof over my bed. I'm too afraid to open my window and see what it is. I'll give it some time and pray that the animal settles down for the night or, even better, leaves.

Today we had an opportunity to submit a first page to be read aloud and then critiqued by the faculty: 

Scott Nash (illustrator & marketing guru)

John Cusick (writer & agent @ Greenhouse Literary)

Andrea Martin (associate editor at Harper Collins)

Lynda Mullaly Hunt (author)

Wouldn't you know it, one of mine got picked.  This one was a page from The Other Side of Normal, my YA about a dead homecoming queen hell-bent on winning back her crown.

I received some interesting feedback from the panel. All of them said my writing is "very visual" and "sophisticated" (yay me!), that they "easily pictured the scene in slow motion," which they found "cool." John Cusick said "the images are fascinating." Andrea Martin said, "It sounds like this will be a fun book."

And then the shit hit the fan. 

3 out of 4 said that they wanted more voice so that they had a better sense of the main character. VOICE.  I was laughing (crying) inside. Voice? Immediately, my MC let loose a torrent of verbal thrashing in my head. Then suddenly, she stopped. She stopped because these panel experts were unanimous in their opinion and they weren't kidding.

So, what the hell happened?

1) Shock & Denial:

Uh, yeah. First draft - bound to be some problems. Don't sweat it. 

2) Pain & Guilt:
I am so embarrassed! Why did I ever put my page in there to be read? Why did I want my page to be read? Here I am thinking I'm a good solid writer and *sniff* I was so wrong. I made a huge mistake giving up my other career.

3) Anger & Bargaining: 

Wait a minute. This was so not my fault. Hearing what is written can be very different than reading what is written. If the speaker leaves out the pauses, skips the beats, doesn't emphasize italics, misses the taglines, and doesn't read it like I would... voice suffers. In other words, it wasn't the writer, it wasn't the listeners, it was the reader who didn't get voice - this was not my fault. It really wasn't.

4) Depression, Reflection, Loneliness:

This was not the reader's fault. This was not the listeners' fault. This was my fault. I now understand what they were saying and know for certain that this complete and total social and career embarrassment was absolutely, completely, and totally my fault. My page sucks. My writing sucks. I suck. Nobody likes the way I write. I'll never be a master writer. I'll never be a good enough conduit for these stories. And all these friends I made here? They're going to shun me.

5) The Upward Turn:
Okay, I've taken a breath. I've calmed down. I've admitted to several people now that my first page was read. They're still friendly towards me. Sure, I was rejected, but not completely rejected. I'm starting to take this in stride. I'm looking over my notes. Really, this wasn't a complete disaster. I have a lot of material to work with. My writing has even improved since I first drafted this material. Why don't I give this scene another shot?

6) Reconstruction and Working Through:
Oh, wow, this experience of having someone else read my work was damn near perfect instruction. It was like listening to an audiobook. I love listening to audiobooks. Someday my own novels will be available in that format. It's truly helpful to hear my writing spoken aloud BY SOMEONE ELSE BESIDES ME! I know how my characters sound. I can mimic their inflections when I say their lines. I can get their meaning and subtleties across just by the tone and rhythm of my voice. But random reader probably imagines a different voice than mine. She won't know my MC is an insecure schemer unless I show it on the page... and, gasp, even if I didn't do it here, I know I CAN DO THAT!

7) Acceptance and Hope:
Okay, so this was both embarrassing and informative. I'm going to use what I've learned this weekend about myself, about the craft, and about the market, to improve my writing. What's more, I'm going to pay it forward and share a few pointers on voice, just in case you, dear reader, one day are slapped with a cold fish of similar feedback across your bright innocent cheeks.

Basically, voice in a nutshell is the opinions and commentary of the POV character. Scenes should be filtered through this person's POV and emotions. Example: You know those annoying people who have an opinion on like EVERYTHING, yah well, ding ding ding, that's what the market wants. Especially include opinions on things that matter to the MC, the things she pauses and especially fixates on, those are key. EMOTE. Have feelings. In other words, show why your POV character is nuts.

What's next for me?

Well, that animal on my roof has settled down for the night. It's freaking freezing here in the woods, so I'm going to double up my socks and snuggle down in my bed with all the covers. I'll probably dream of highlighters finding all those places where my MC might show her particular brand of insanity. She's going to love that. I have a premonition that my readers will, too.

What about you? Ever get slapped in the face with a cold wet fish? In other words, do you ever struggle with voice in your writing?  How willing are you to wave your crazy flag?

Pain Builds Character

I found this wonderful guide on Darcy Patterson's Fict!on Notes blog where she makes the point that emotional pain creates strong stories. Darcy took the visual pain scale commonly displayed on hospital walls and compared it to how much pain a character should be feeling at any point in a novel.

You can find her post here:
http://www.darcypattison.com/characters/are-you-in-pain/

Darcy has some great ideas and I've taken plenty of liberties with them.
Here's a variation on the visual guide Darcy used, and my take on it...

Assess the Pain

No pain. If your character, especially your main character, is feeling no pain, you ain't got a story my friend.

Mild pain. You can start here when you're introducing your main character (MC) and her problem. You can end here, too, with tying up story threads and smoothing over residual pain. But when you move on, remember that meaty middle needs some punch!

Moderate pain. Your MC wants something but obstacles crop up that interfere with your MC obtaining her goal. You punch her in the gut. She's surprised. She's annoyed. She's frustrated. She's angry. She's holding her breath because she's afraid. Did you know fear is another word for emotional pain? Yep. By invading her personal space, her physical and/or non-physical boundaries, you've introduced some primal fear. Tap into that pain and pay attention to how she reacts.

You can read more about fear and creating a character's emotional arc in my May 2012 posts, starting here: Identifying a Character's Emotional Arc

N.B., If you find your action is fury fast, be sure to provide your readers with breathing space by contrasting the active stress with some emotional rest.

Severe pain. Consider yourself a knife thrower. Your MC experiences severe pain when you throw a knife in her shoulder and then walk over and twist it. I'll bet your MC is wondering what the heck just happened. Then maybe she's panicking. It's crisis time. Oh, wait, there's another knife in the air and she forgot to duck. Zing! Struck again.

Worst pain. @#$% the knife is heading for her heart! Nothing motivates a character more than facing death. The death of her. The death of a loved one. The death of her dream. The death of her ideals. You get the picture. You are now at the climax of the story. Your MC's animal instincts kick in and she's in fight or flight mode. Either way, she can't take the pain anymore and something big has to happen. There must be some resolution, like maybe now she's the knife thrower and you're the target. Jeesh! Seriously though, most people in pain must find a release. For some people, that means taking it out on someone else. How does your MC react to the worst pain ever?


Pain in Perspective

So, let's put this pain scale in perspective. Don't throw knives at young children. What I mean to say is picture books don't need such an intense level of pain. Young children cry when something is taken away from them. Losing control over an object can elicit painful responses. Really, melt their ice cream cone, and that's about the level of intense emotion you want to aim for.

For a middle grade child, emotional pain becomes more personal and now maybe they've fear losing or have lost a friend, or a pet, or a teacher. Or, maybe they're the teacher's pet and they fear losing their status.

Young adult and beyond, even more personal, they're losing their self-identity. They thought they were a certain kind of person and now they're not so sure. Then BAM! now they're doing something they never thought they'd do and who does this make them now? Can they ever go back? Do they want to?


Painful POV

If you're having trouble figuring out point-of-view for your story, examine the key points in your story and find the character who is in the most pain. If you consistently find a secondary character in more pain than your protagonist, consider switching point-of-view. And, if you find characters in no pain or in only mild pain, refer to the chart above! Those characters can and will be ignored, so either delete them or figure out how to inflict some emotional pain on them.


Do you find the pain assessment tool useful for planning and/or reviewing your MC's emotional arc? As a writer, are you mean enough? I look forward to reading all about how you torture your characters. Leave your comments below.

Some recent reviews of books I've read...

Melissa's bookshelf: read

Eleanor and Park

by Rainbow Rowell

This has to be one of the best books about teenage love I have ever read. Ever. The emotions are so honest, immediate and vulnerable that they practically render themselves sacred. I was so wrapped up in their story, I put aside everythi...

Mink River

by Brian Doyle

Achingly beautiful. This is one of those books that I just can't read in one sitting. Brian Doyle has stepped into my life as a favorite author. An author who speaks to my heart and my truth, his prose is elegant and easy and beautiful. ...

Women Food and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything

by Geneen Roth

tagged:
spirituality, self-help, and non-fiction

The Dovekeepers

by Alice Hoffman

The Dovekeepers is a historical novel blown through by the winds of ancient Jewish and Egyptian magic and mysticism. The setting is ancient Judea in 70 C.E., a time of Roman domination and pogroms against the Jews. The story traces four ...

tagged:
historical-fiction and supernatural

Sacré Bleu: A Comedy d'Art

by Christopher Moore

Christopher Moore is one of my writer heroes. Nothing is better than a writer who is courageous enough to challenge themselves to improve their craft and not bend to industry standards. Here again, we find multiple POVs and a roster seco...

tagged:
historical-fiction and supernatural

What is this sh!t?

I've been an organic gardener longer than I've recognized that I'm a writer. I've gardened in front yards, side yards, backyards. In my hubris I've grown sunflowers on a balcony in Switzerland overlooking an enormous field of sunflowers. I've even guerrilla gardened, which, for the uninitiated, is not growing guerrillas but rather gardening in random public areas that need a bit of pretty.

I've smiled, laughed, cried, gone numb, shouted in complete frustration, and fallen in love in my garden.  When the garden's in full bloom, I pass the time weeding and watering, rapt with attention to every leaf and bloom, fruit, veg, herb, insect, and bird, and I often think about my latest WIP and feel my way through how the next scene wants to play out.

Now, early May, my garden is not in full bloom. It's lying there sleeping under a very thick layer of composted cow manure reminding me of the story I'm working on. That story, like my garden, is lean and mean and right now buried under a thick layer of bullsh!t author insecurity because I've changed my writing method from channeled download to structure structure structure and, true to her personality, my main character stubbornly veers off course between my fingerfalls on the keyboard.

Back to my garden. I thought I was doing my garden a favor. Years ago, in another garden, I did this very thing, adding composted manure to my garden, or so I thought. Now my memory comes back that years ago that composted manure was mixed with topsoil before I laid it on my garden beds.  This recent delivery of cow manure is simply composted cow manure from organically fed cows. There's minimal smell and it is indeed composted, but it's also thick and solid and mixed with hay or straw or some other unwieldy long grass that winds around the tiller blades and grinds them to a halt.  Plus, there's such a thick layer of cow manure that I cannot reach the soil underneath.  That sh!t is so thick I can't even hack my way through it.

If it were a writing/editing exercise, I'd offload it onto a separate document or maybe just delete the whole sh!tload of it and start again. It's not a writing exercise though. It's my garden space. Maybe there's a lesson in here. Maybe in my writing I'm expecting too much perfection from a first draft.

Or maybe, next time, I'll get my compost from a modern unicorn and my stories will write themselves.

For more information on organic gardening, go here: http://www.organicgardening.com/
For more information on guerrilla gardening, go here: http://www.guerrillagardening.org/
For more information on a 1936 modern unicorn, go here: http://blog.modernmechanix.com/bull-with-single-horn-is-modern-unicorn/

Find Me

My library overfloweth.

I have 8 bookcases with double deep rows of books, read and unread, plus tippy "read this soon" bedside stacks, a well-worn public library card, a Sony e-reader, a Nook, and a Kindle.

Find me and my reviews here: Melissa's Goodreads

If there are any good reads you're reading, do share!

What are you reading now?

If- by Rudyard Kipling

Writing, to me, is a way to experience life through another lens.  I push my characters to the brink of disaster and then allow them to fall over the edge.  Why? Because I want to know how they react. Under that, I want to know how I might react if I were them and then measure it against what I feel would be true for me in the same situation.  Of course, inherent in writing fiction and probably in examining our own lives and comparing them to someone else's is that false sense of self. Sometimes we can't see our own faults, and we don't recognize our own blessings. With that in mind, I'll leave you with the words of Rudyard Kipling, and the encouragement to build scenes that test your characters' morals and their dreams of leading meaningful lives.

If-

By Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream – and not make dreams your master;
If you can think – and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
‘ Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!

Big Life Drama Moments

I experienced a major life change last month. Actually, the whole of 2012 was a bit of a challenge. My mother moved in last January, suffering from serious health issues that were quite mysterious, mostly painful, exhausting, and frustrating for her, me, and the rest of my family (meaning, my husband and 2 kids - no one else, I'm an only child). Typical of our relationship, my mother and I clashed and bashed as only alpha mothers and alpha daughters can do in times of unyielding I-don't-know-what-the-heck-to-do-nowness and I found myself in the odd position of trying to take care of my mother, and protect my kids from all the drama.

In my world, when someone I love is suffering, it can really set me off-kilter. And the bratty me that never wants to grow up is stubborn about not wanting to reverse roles with my mother. For the adult me, not knowing why someone is suffering, why they can't help themselves, why I can't help them, consumes my patience like a half-starved wolf. 

September 2012 rolled around and after a sudden kidney failure, she finally had a diagnosis thanks to the persistent efforts of the medical team at Beth Israel Deaconess:  stage 4 Hodgkins Lymphoma.  Normally HL is treated with high success rates, but as my mother had been struggling with symptoms for six years, she had a steeper hill to climb and pretty soon that hill became a mountain. She passed away on November 6, 2012.

My mom's passing was is tough, and it came too quickly after my father's passing in 2008. Remarkably though, my years of studying emotional character arcs and universal story arcs for both my writing and my healing practices have served me well in real life.  I've learned that big life drama moments aren't meant to suck us down into an abyss of sorrow or anger. These moments are in our lives to teach us about ourselves, about life, and about the magic fabric that ties all of our hopes and dreams together. If we, once in a while, allow ourselves to step back from the immediate experience and observe how we deal with crisis, we can mine the experience as something more than just a tragedy. It might even make for a good story someday!

what's your story?

My experience with my mom's illness, her diagnosis, her treatment, and her death has transformed me into something more than I once was. More compassionate, more loving, more understanding, more filled with awe, more at peace. While I don't recommend you all go out and get yourselves a life-or-death circumstance, I do wish for you (and your characters, for all you writers out there!) to find the courage it takes to free yourself from your beliefs about what an experience should be, so that you may discover the transformative experience that it really is. 

Blessings to you in 2013 and happy writing!

September Magic

It's September. A new year for school.  A new year in the Jewish calendar. Time to buckle down.  In the spirit of new pencils and pens, apples and honey, I'm making myself a promise.  I'm going to go full-steam ahead and finish the final round of edits of my upper MG fantasy novel in the next two weeks.


I'm almost there.  I can taste success in the wind (or at least smell the apple pie in the oven).  Let's see, this is about my 7th round of edits. I'm on page 193 of a 270 page manuscript and I finally have a brilliant idea for how to fix my first chapter to reach out and grab my reader friend's nose and pick it.  You read it here:  For the first time ever - it is possible to pick your nose, pick your friends, and now even pick your friend's nose. Satisfying, isn't it?


If you knew me and the current state of chaos in my life, you'd probably think I'm crazy to set this deadline for myself. Take this week for instance: my went into the ICU and requires daily visits, both daughters have colds, my dog is rolling around in something stinkerific in the backyard, I'm waaaaay behind planning a bat mitzvah (as in, not even started), my front stairs are torn up, there's some weird emergency light shining on my car dashboard, and oh yeah, housekeeping got bumped down to Z priority (obvious!).



If you know me well, you'll realize that I thrive in chaos like this.  Seriously.  I am the eye in the storm. I will meet my deadline.  How will I manage? A whole lot of willpower and a sprinkle of magic.



Love you!  Now go work your own magic.

WriteOnCon - to post or not to post

Once again I'm participating in WriteOnCon.  For those of you who don't know about it, it's a TOTALLY FREE online writers' conference for kid lit.  Registration is free.  Participation is free.  Lurking is free.  Exposure to industry professionals is free.  Critiques are free.  It's all free.  Did I say free?  Yes, I did!

Basically in all my spare time this Tuesday and Wednesday, I'll be sitting on my coccyx in front of my computer and absorbing information like a sponge.  Hopefully, I'll make a few friends along the way.

Obvs, I'm excited about the conference.  So, now why have I been debating whether to post my QL and first 250/450 pages?  It's like the blind-date jitters, I guess, and the reasons basically center around self-esteem (i.e., how bad do I suck as a writer?).

It's weird that this fear of being seen peeks its ugly head in my room right now when opportunity is pinging on my computer screen.  Seriously, why doesn't my fear have any logic?  And why have my friends been asking today about the saboteur archetype as defined by the brilliant Caroline Myss?

Saboteur - sabotage.  Fear gives rise to self-sabotage.  Oh.

Best not to let irrational fear get in my way.  My writing has stood naked in front of my critique groups already and survived without coloring me permanently pink from embarrassment.

So, what am I going to do??  Plan of attack.
1) Troll through other people's writing;
2) Leave some critiques.
3) Breathe
4) Post QL.
5) Enjoy

Participating in WriteOnCon 2012?  Friend me!  user name: petrichor

It stuck in my brain and spoke!

A funny thing happened today while I was reading my writing partner George Kulz's blog. George enters lots of writing contests.  One that he entered twice back in May was at Gennifer Albin's blog. 

Gennifer posted a series of images and asked readers to post a caption of 150 words or less. The contest winner was awarded critique of their query letter by Gennifer's literary agent, Mollie Glick of Foundry Literary and Media.

Today is well past May, obvs. Didn't matter to me. One of the images, the one to the left of this post, stuck in my brain and spoke.  So, what the hey, I wrote down the words and hit submit.  Sometimes inspiration grabs hold and shakes the words loose!

For Gennifer's blog and my (late) entry, check out:  http://genniferalbin.com/agentversary-entry-day-5/

Mine is the seventh entry.  My writing partner George's entry is the first.

Creating an Emotional Arc: Stages 5 - 8

Mirror mirror on the wall:
how to be the most inspiring kick-ass character of them all.

A lot of writers will end an emotional arc at stage 4, with the main character confronting and then defeating the mean evil dude, tag on a quick conclusion and call it a victory. An ending like this is exciting and something we know and anticipate as readers. It’s also a technique that’s handy for carrying your emotional arc through a book series until its resolution in the final installment. For more on stages 1-4, see my earlier post.


Using the Harry Potter books by way of example, I wasn’t particularly surprised about the endings in books 1-6, but I felt a large measure of satisfaction about them because good triumphed over evil. Still, something emotional was left unresolved, and I felt that emptiness both as a reader (and as a movie-goer) because Harry was a more tortured soul with each consecutive book in the series. J.K. Rowling finally and inevitably addresses Harry’s soul in book 7 when Harry is, at last, able to clear his emotional traumas so that healing can begin. We know Harry’s been able to heal because at last he is confident and his personal boundaries are solid when he stands on the platform and waves goodbye to his children aboard the Hogwarts Express.


As difficult as it is to leave Harry Potter aside, let’s pick up where we left off running through the 8 stages in clearing emotional trauma. (1) Something happened that (2) angers our character and makes her feel threatened, so she (3) takes her anger out on other people – blaming them, because if it weren’t for them she wouldn’t feel like she does now. (4) She gets so angry that she works up the courage to confront the person who did her wrong and battles them. Maybe she raises her voice, maybe she swears, maybe she even goes ninja on the villain! Now the dust settles and she’s standing amid the aftermath of stage 4. Where does she go from here?

5. Finding the mirror

Up until now, our character’s anger has motivated her to seek retribution and justice. Her most natural human reaction now would be to justify her actions by believing that she’s right, that she’s in the right, that she has the right, that the other is just plain wrong. She's trounced the villain and now some might already call her a hero, but not me. I want her to inspire our readers, so we dare her to reach stage five and look beyond her own self and consider that the villain may not be a one-dimensional evil force but rather a more complex character with his own set of values and fears. Before I'll call her a hero, she needs to learn from this experience and bring back some wisdom. 


She’s ready to learn. Now that she’s released the pressure valve on her anger, she is calm enough to engage in some logical and perceptive thinking. She pulls in the reigns on blaming and projection and begins to see how she may have co-created the situation.


She notices the chink in the villain’s armor, a whisper of his vulnerability. And now our character flexes her maturity muscles because rather than take advantage of the villain’s vulnerability, your character begins to wonder why the villain acts the way he does. She wonders if the villain is afraid of something and then discovers what that fear is. She explores why the villain might fear that something, and what his belief is about it. Soon she sees that the villain believes something false, and that false belief creates a fear that compels the villain to act out to protect himself or something or someone he cares about.


Can you see why most characters screech to a halt before they’ve reached stage 5?  Finding the mirror is hard! Finding the mirror requires a certain amount of psychological and emotional maturity from your character. She must be able to look for the life lesson in what happened and begin to appreciate the role the villain played in teaching her that lesson.


**NOTE: In exploring this stage of finding the mirror, you might notice that your character has sadistic fantasies about exploiting the villain’s vulnerabilities and finding sick and depraved ways to cause the villain further pain and suffering. This fantasy behavior is Totally. Perfectly. Natural.  Enjoy it and move on.

6. Recognizing the reflection

If you’re like me, then your life is basically a soundtrack. Memories and ideas stir up lyrics to songs. The song evoked at this stage 6 of emotional clearing is a no-brainer. Before you start moonwalking and waving around a sequined glove, take a moment to appreciate that something magical happens before that Michael Jackson “Man in the Mirror” moment.



Maybe your character sees the villain as selfish, quick-tempered, untrustworthy, or manipulative. Superimposing their reflections, your character has the opportunity to see that the villain is reflecting or mirroring back an aspect of herself. She too can be selfish, quick-tempered, untrustworthy, or manipulative. I'll go so far as to call her a hero if she can now sees that she has done the same thing that she judged the villain for doing. 


Powerful, eh?  Damn straight.  Wait, there’s more. When your character’s anger crumbles it brings a delightful chaser of empathy and sadness because she understands first-hand, the fear that drives both her and the villain to that behavior.


Sit with that a moment.  Your character the hero looks in the mirror and sees the villain and her own image superimposed. Your hero and your villain are one and the same. Chilling.  If you’re inclined to write like Edgar Allen Poe, maybe you want to stop here. Let your character suffer a mental breakdown, convincing herself that she will never ever get out of this endless loop of pain.  Allow her to be haunted by the sound of her own beating heart.

"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity." ~ Edgar Allan Poe (1809-1849)

Or, you can move on to stage 7. 

7. Forgiveness

If your character is anything like me, I’m basically in shock in stage 6 when I see how the villain is mirroring back my own bad behavior. Then I move into feeling awful about myself at the start of stage 7. Now, the only thing that’s going to see me through and inspire others to take this journey is finding my way to forgiveness. Here’s how it’s done.


In stage 6, your character is staring at herself and the villain superimposed in the mirror and she’s seeing that they’re both afraid of something and it caused both of them to act out in a similar manner. Whatever the behavior is that is reflected back to her, it is one that ultimately is motivated by fear. It’s time for your character to do some exploring into her psyche.


Her next step is to ask, “What am I afraid of?” Let her spill her guts and talk about all the things she’s afraid of. A pattern will emerge that will point to a common theme in the things she says about herself, others, and the world.


This theme highlights your character’s false core belief. It developed over time, usually from childhood and is influenced by significant life events and particular life circumstances. A core belief is always an “I” statement, as in “I am unworthy.” She will hold onto this core-belief with a vise grip. A belief “Nobody will choose me” is called a supporting belief and it is a prediction about what others will do or have done. Her way of interpreting other people’s reactions gives the core belief the appearance of being true and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.


Your character is going to recognize how she has self-sabotaged by focusing on information that supports her belief and ignoring evidence that contradicts it. More, she is going to realize that her (and the villain’s) core belief is false and she is going to begin to understand and forgive herself for acting out in defense of that untrue core belief.

8. Letting go & moving on

No surprise, core beliefs are hard to change. However, your character kicks ass and she’s going to do just that. She’s made it through 7 difficult stages of clearing her emotional trauma and she is not about to backslide now. She is going to shatter the illusion of the core belief and uncover the truth, which will be a statement completely opposite from her false core belief; in this instance, “I am unworthy” shifts to “I am worthy.” And she’ll reinforce this new positive core belief with evidence and information.


At this point, there’s a tangible shift. All those emotions your character felt, the anger, pain, blame, empathy and sadness transmute to appreciation and gratitude for the villain. Realizing the powerful gift brought by the villain in this encounter, your character can at last release him. She may even feel compassion for the villain and be able to apologize and validate his pain.


Now, when your character looks in the mirror, the glass is clear and she sees only herself. True, strong, wise. Totally worthy. Mirror mirror on the wall, she is the most inspiring kick-ass character of them all.  Seriously!  She’s cleared emotional trauma. The conflict is over.


Bonus – there’s more trust in her relationships because she’s able to work through conflicts when they arise rather than run away.

Summary

So, there you have it. Three blogs and an exercise giving you my take on creating an emotional arc using anger. In case you missed my first post, here are the eight stages in one handy list: 

The 8 Stages

1. The smoking gun

2. Anger

3. Projection and blaming

4. Expressing anger and releasing pain

5. Finding the mirror

6. Recognizing the reflection

7. Forgiveness

8. Letting go and moving on

Most of the time, we go through these stages intuitively. These are the times when the smoking gun isn't aimed at us, or it misses its target, or our shields are solid enough to protect us. Other times, the bullet hits its target and we are hurt enough to get angry. 

Anger is an energetic signal that you are ready to make a change. How you want to make that change is a mental decision. It involves calculating the variables between changing the other person (doesn't work), changing the situation (might work), or changing something about yourself (worth a try).  

When a person in real-life or a character in a novel is brave enough to work through their anger and change a core belief about themselves they are, in my opinion, the most inspiring kick-ass character of them all.

Let me know what you think about this post series, and if there are other ideas you’d like to explore with me. I’d love to hear from you!

An exercise to tap your anger

Go ahead, beat up your sofa!

For this post, I want to back up a bit and really dig into stage 2 of the 8 stages of emotional clearing. Stage 2 is where your character must tap into her anger. As I said in my earlier post, many people get stuck at stage 2 because they don't recognize how anger disguises itself in other emotions or behaviors.

If you or your character has no clue how to touch anger or are just plain afraid to do it, this is the exercise for you! 

Getting in touch with anger.  Ooooh, that's a fun one. For someone who has a difficult time accessing anger, the key is to find something that's opposite of your normal routine. So, for instance, for people who spend much of their days in their brain (writers, software engineers, bankers, really any desk job) physical techniques can be very effective for releasing anger. People who are quiet can benefit from using their voice.  Here's a great technique that combines both types of release, physical and vocal.  

Things you'll need:  

1. whiffle bat (plastic bat)
2. sofa
3. room to move with no breakable objects, people or pets nearby

Get yourself a whiffle bat and stand in front of your sofa.  Now think about a person who triggered you. Picture them in your mind. Hear their awful words. Picture them pointing their finger at you, yelling, accusing, blaming as they cross your personal boundary. Feel how your belly starts to churn up some energy. You're starting to feel that familiar flight or flight sensation. Stick with it. 

The person is coming at you, still yelling, accusing, blaming. You can't even hear the words any more. Just a roar in your ears and flashes of their angry face.  

Now pick up the whiffle bat

Give yourself permission to pummel your sofa.  

Really swing and whack.  Cuss.  LOUDLY.  Blame the source of your anger.  Cuss them to hell.  Keep going until you have no more whacks or cussing left to do. Drop the bat. 

Notice your energy.  Notice how you feel.  

Write that feeling down, or discuss it with someone.  Do you feel lighter? Do you feel lost? Do you feel more yourself? Do you feel pleasure? Do you feel guilty? What do you feel? However you feel, ask yourself why. What need did that release in energy fulfill?  What needs do you still have? 

Come up with some ways to fulfill those needs.

You're a writer - remember those feelings. Allow your character to draw on them to move through their own issues.  When your character recognizes their needs, they'll come up with a plan.

The technique above is very useful for expelling a large amount of anger and resentment very quickly. Notice how you feel about the technique. Your reaction to the technique is a reflection of how you feel about releasing anger. For some, the technique can be frightening and overwhelming.  Others relish the idea of pummeling something, swearing and screaming.  Some people only want to scream.  Some people can't scream at all, or won't cuss.  And others give only wimpy taps with the bat. For some, the session goes on for ages until they are physically and emotionally drained. For others, the session lasts only a couple of minutes. Whatever you won't do, or had difficulty doing in that exercise, those are signals of your personal boundaries, your code of behavior. 

Keep in mind though that the boundaries are artificial boundaries - you make them, you can break them, you can make those boundaries flexible and healthy. You're in a safe environment - just you and the whiffle bat and the sofa. Nothing is going to break. No one is going to get hurt. Things can only get better. Now, in this safe environment, is the time to give yourself permission to shift energetically.  

Giving yourself permission to release your anger in a safe environment is a great step toward healing. Because you are replacing the person who triggered you with an inanimate object, and you are quickly releasing a large amount of energy in a safe environment, the technique shifts your attention away from the other person onto you. Participating in the experience energetically imprints itself on you, shoring up your personal boundaries and giving you confidence that you can take care of yourself in the future. And with that confidence of being able to work through your anger to identify and fulfill your needs, you are less likely to be triggered by other people.

And now let's shift to writing.  I'm curious. How do your characters deal with anger?

Creating a Character's Emotional Arc: in stages 1 - 4

Imagine how excited I was to learn that my years of training in energy medicine and psychology could actually help me construct a fictional character’s emotional arc!  Now quadruple that and add a cherry on top because when I think about the ripple effect and how relaying this info on to you and how you can use it to reach your readers, I’m over the moon with excitement and gratitude.  


We’ve arrived at the fun part, where we see how to create a character’s emotional arc.  Let’s get to it. We’ll start with stages 1 through 4.

1. The smoking gun
Picture a smoking gun in your mind and chances are you’ll sense something sinister is afoot. Smoking guns indicate that someone violated a personal boundary or an agreement on how they are expected to behave around you. In writing, we call this threat or danger “the inciting incident.”


2. Anger  Biologically speaking, our bodies react to a perceived threat or danger by releasing certain hormones like adrenalin and cortisol, speeding our heart rate and increasing blood pressure, slowing digestion, increasing blood flow to major muscle groups and adjusting other autonomic nervous functions in order to give our bodies a burst of energy and strength.

Emotionally, the inciting incident triggers anger. Anger may be hard to recognize beneath the layers of anxiety, self-pity and sadness, but it’s there and your character will need to use that anger as a driving force to move through to the next stage. 


Finding the anger can be difficult because by culture or by nature, a lot of people don't allow themselves to get angry. They feel uncomfortable or even go so far as to believe they have no right to their anger. Are you one of them? Sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to fume in order for our characters to do the same. 


Look for clues to your character's anger. If you find her saying something like, “It’s not worth getting upset over,” that's a clear indication that she is stuffing her anger. Other indications are typical behavioral responses to the threat. Males typically respond with fight (aggression) or flight (social withdrawal, substance abuse), while females typically respond by protecting to their children, if they have any, and by seeking social support in groups. But hey, it’s your novel. Who’s to say that your character must conform to these typical roles? 


Just remember that at this stage your character does not want to be nice, she wants to be ANGRY.


3. Projection and Blaming
Now that your character is good and angry, go ahead and let her blame someone for causing her to feel that way. Not taking responsibility for our own feelings is called projecting. Many people project and blame out of earshot, but never confront the person with whom they are upset. It’s easy to see why. Most people would think twice about expressing their anger to the person holding a smoking gun.


4. Expressing anger and releasing pain
Your character has finally surmounted the obstacles of stages 1, 2 and 3. A round of applause is in order because it takes courage to make it this far.  You’ve reached the turning point in your novel. This is the step where your character expresses her anger toward the transgressor, the villain, the mean and evil dude, and finally stands up for herself. This is when your reader is anticipating a smack down and it is a cause for celebration.

How your character stands up for herself, depends on the intensity of the boundary violation and the inciting smoking gun incident. Mild violations may require just speaking up about it. Stronger violations, the kind that elicit reader response, may entail speaking up plus throwing in a few choice cuss words for good measure, dammit!

But what if your character is not willing to scold the mean and evil dude? Totally not surprising. Most people feel pretty weak when it comes to expressing their anger. Ultimately though, suppressing anger is futile. Unexpressed anger is toxic and your character will find a way to release it. Instead of confronting the evil dude, you might find your character turning anger inward against herself, or letting it out sideways by lashing out at the innocent, or even taking a circuitous route by engaging in passive aggressive behavior against the perpetrator. How your character manages her anger might violate personal boundaries and agreements and trigger an angry response from someone else. And yes, you can count me in among the wicked and wily scumbling my fingers and sneering, “Mwah ha haaaa!” because this kind of tension triggers subplots.  


But remember, if your goal is an emotionally rewarding ending, suppressing anger is not ultimately the answer. Your character must express her anger directly in order to release the pain.

A lot of writers will stop here, either subconsciously or purposefully, with the main character confronting and then defeating the mean evil dude followed by a quick conclusion, and call it a victory. 


How easy is it for you to express your anger? Do you confront the transgressor or does your anger come out in other ways? Are you uncomfortable at any point? Where is your sticking point? 

Introducing the Eight Stages of Emotional Clearing aka Identifying a Character's Emotional Arc

Over the years, I’ve come across many techniques to clear negative emotions. Some of them occur naturally, and sometimes alarmingly, in our bodies. For example, toxic emotions can result in stomach upset similar to food poisoning and have its consequences with a day or more on or in front of the toilet. Or, our bodies can try to eliminate those toxins in other ways, as in hair loss, skin rashes and breakouts. Alarming, disgusting, nasty gross, yessiree. Go on, see my earlier post on why it's important to clear negative emotions.

Techniques that I’ve used in my healing practice to help my clients navigate through some pretty tough times might be EFT, holding alarm points, meditation, energy work, massage, and counseling. They are all extremely effective techniques, but they’re not easy to translate into a MG or YA novel, especially where I want to express a character’s emotional arc through action and interaction with other characters.

That set me to thinking about kids and how they might express their emotions and the consequences. Really, they’re no different than the teens and tween we all have living in our own psyches. Tweens and teens often don’t have access to any of those healing tools, and their raging hormones often result in confusing emotions and anger at some level for losing control of someone or something. The anger then spurs them to lash out either at people around them, or themselves, setting up conflict. Even in adult literature, those steamy scenes are wrought with conflict and that inner voice that asks, “Uh oh, what have a I done?” The conflict is what makes a plot intense.  It’s the page-turner.  



Conflict only gets you so far. Readers look for a satisfying ending. For me a satisfying ending would serve up justice, makes me feel good, and ties up all those loose ends. But as a writer, I can't go on only what I would like to see; I also have to consider what the character in my story wants. The ending to a story is set up by how the main character suffers those conflicts, and it is rendered satisfying by how they resolve those conflicts in a way that is deep and meaningful for them, probably one that doesn’t involve breaking out in hives or spending the day in the bathroom. 

To nudge my characters along the their emotional arcs, I loosely borrowed from the wisdom of Debbie Ford's Shadow work in Dark Side of the Light Chasers and came up with eight stages of emotional clearing. These are stages that everyone goes through to resolve emotional pain and trauma.

The 8 Stages
1. The smoking gun
2. Anger
3. Projection and blaming
4. Expressing anger and releasing pain
5. Finding the mirror
6. Recognizing the reflection
7. Forgiveness
8. Letting go and moving on

Most of the time, we go through these stages intuitively.  Other times we get stuck and need a bit more nudging. I like knowing where my characters get stuck because that informs their personalities.

Want to know more about these stages and how to build a character's emotional arc? Read on.